Friday, January 18, 2013

Mr Middlemiss

Colin's Wonderful Letter Writing machine

Mr Middlemess wrote to the Southland Times to comment on my earlier letter, in which I described the experience of teaching my daughter to drive and my pleasure in seeing how the roadsides are being managed differently by the Southland District Council, and look far more attractive with their wildflowers than they did when they were sprayed to bare soil.

Mr Middlemiss wrote:

In answer to Robert Guyton's letter (Tuesday Jan 6) who wants to know you are teaching your daughter to drive? Are you qualified to teach?
 If you are busy looking around the countryside, you are not watching her. Will this be another road accident waiting to happen if this is the way you are teaching her?
  Roadsides must be cleared, we are not all green.
  The only true wilderness is between a green's ears.


Beautifully said, Colin.
On top of the lovely ridiculousness not often given so freely, you've gifted me a new t-shirt slogan, one I'll print and wear with pride;

"The only true wilderness is between a green's ears"

You don't know how uplifting your accidental compliment is.

Thank you, Colin. Thank you.


Shunda barunda said...

You gotta wonder about the lives of these individuals, which I too have recently been clashing with.
What would be their species name?

It turns out that I'm an "anti Coast greenie" (Coast meaning WEST of course) because I objected to a contractor tipping steel blasting waste into the river.

Take a look at this Robert and see what you think (aren't video cameras a wonderful thing) it isn't my footage, but I wish it was:

And comments on the Grey star site:

robertguyton said...

Well, Shunda. I wouldn't worry too much. Your accuser has given you 2 out of 3, 66% (that's a pass), by calling you "Coaster" and "greenie" along with the negative "anti".
Mind you, your "red neck twits" seems just the thing to inflame passions. Have I taught you nothing, Shunda :-)

I watched some concrete contractors washing their barrows in the Avon one day. Red neck twits!

robertguyton said...

I forgot to say, great to hear from you! And good on you for speaking out about that trashy behaviour. You did learn something from me :-)

Shunda barunda said...

I think there comes a time when inflaming passions is unavoidable Robert. The West Coast is held back by an utterly ridiculous tribalistic mentality that seeks to define the place by tragedy, misery and the bleakest of outlooks for the future.

It is such an utterly depressing mindset that it is literally driving younger generations away as they reach an age where they begin to challenge 'the tribe' and its values.

I have thought about leaving, and then I realized I love the place too much, so now I am going to take down the tribe instead. And I have allies that I didn't even know existed. It's war baby!!

robertguyton said...

Can you keep us posted from the battle field?
It sounds as though it'll be worth reading about. If you need supplies or reinforcements, you have my email :-)
(I'm seeing Mrs Barunda in a field-nurses uniform, cooling fevered brows and administering tots of rum).

Shunda barunda said...

Mrs B will make a fine field nurse, she has lost 15kg and is in prime physical condition for the rigorous task.
And I have recently discovered the joys of rowing! It's remarkable how far one can row a boat without getting too tired, so a navy of sorts is in the making!

robertguyton said...

The Barandas Go To War!

I'll document your victories - War Correspondent!

I've some hemp-twine and corn-cobs - I'll build you a spy-drone.

There is much to be done.

Shunda barunda said...

Corn is such a versatile plant, is there anything it can't do?

robertguyton said...

It makes a hopeless mirror. I've seen excellent corn-husk moccasins.